Tofu Lunch

TOFU LUNCH

I had lunch with my best, and possibly oldest friend today. We've been good friends since gradeschool, and best friends though college.

We hardly see each other nowadays, both of us being busy with our relationships, work, family etc. But we get to have a short chat every few months. Today we had lunch at Likha Diwa, the art venue/vegetarian cuisine place in UP, shared a few stories, updated each other how we were doing, what we've been doing since we last saw each other (3 months would be my guess).

It was mostly light talk. None of the deep esoteric philosophical talks guys sometimes have when they spend the night drinking. "Pare, what if you had a million dollars, what would you do with it?" or "Dude, what's the meaning of life?". Just a meal and some stories.

I was leading to some "deep" philosophical insight from this, but I seem to have lost my train of thought. So, I'll just say that I'm glad to (finally) have caught up with my old friend, shared a few words, and without being too sentimental, remembering, acknowledging, and thanking him, who has played a big role in my life by simply spending time with him. Even if its just a tofu lunch.

"Leave your ego at the door"

My yoga instructor always tell us to leave our ego, concerns and our problems outside the studio at the start of the class. It's easy to understand how carrying our problems into yoga practice or in any worthwhile activity can be distracting and unproductive. But the ego? It took me a while to understand that.

Honestly one of the reasons I enjoy yoga sessions is because I am one of the few, few people in the class who can really do the positions and stretches. I took pride in doing the advanced versions of the poses, the difficult stretches, the headstands, etc...

It's only recently that I learned that I was missing the whole point. Yoga is never about competition. It's about knowing yourself, your own body, and your own abilities. That's what makes the experience unique and liberating.

Ego is a very dangerous thing. It pushes us to do things we are not really ready for. It blinds us from acknowledging our faults and mistakes. It makes us believe we are better than everyone else

This is where it is most dangerous, I believe. A lot of people I've known (including myself) have sought false comfort in some form of ego tripping. We find solace believing that we are smarter, more good looking, more well to do, more educated, more talented, more spiritual, (These are examples, not necessarily all MY thoughts ok? Hehe) or what have you. We do this for many reasons, but especially when we feel insecure. We try to repair our own egos by putting others down either in action or just in our minds. The result? We have people who will never be content until they've stepped on everybody.

These are my thoughts, then. We are not BETTER than everybody else. Each person has a path to take and a time to take it. And the sooner we realize that we don't have to be better than the next person, we can start being happy with ourselves and who we are.

I hope I'm not preaching here. Almost everyone already knows these things I'm saying. But not everyone knows HOW to let go of the ego, not even myself, not completely, not yet. It is one of my paths. And I will see it though.

My greeting to all who have come this way and those still on their own paths.

Namaste

The Ericsson P900

I'm adding a new item to my wishlist. It's the Ericsson P900. It's almost the perfect device for me except that it runs on Symbian. But I think the new UI makes it more pleasing to look at, and I think the new version of the OS has pleasing new capabilities and features.

Ericsson P900 (italicized features are my favorite)

208x320 pixel display, Alarm clock, Audio player, Backlight display, Bluetooth™ wireless technology ; Calculator; Calendar; Call list; Camera VGA Camera integrated; Colour LCD 65,536 ; CommuniCorder, Email, GPRS, Handwriting recognition, High-Speed Data, Infrared port ,Instant Messaging, Java, MMS, MMS templates, MP3 Audio; MPEG4 Video, Memory Stick Duo™ ; Memory dynamic, Mobile chat; Modem, PIM Sync, Picture Phonebook , Picture editor, Picture gallery, QuickShare™, RS232 cable support, SMS long (Text Messaging), Screensaver, Sleep mode, Sound recorder, Speaker phone, Start-up/Shutdown shows, Synchronisation Apple® , Synchronisation PC , Tasks, Themes display, Touch-screen , USB support, Video player , Video streaming, Voice control , WAP 2.0, WTLS, cHTML, Conference calls, Voice Mail, Tri-Band

For those who want more info and are considering getting me this for Christmas (Hint) , here's the link

http://www.sonyericsson.com/p900/

Yesterday after coming from work, I was so looking forward to yoga class which I missed for more than a week. But then my father texted me that we had dinner plans with some of my aunts. This meant that I probably won't make it to my yoga class... again. I got really irritated by the interruption. I really don't mind these family dinners that much. What bugs me is when they suddenly pop up and I'm expected to drop everything and attend them. The whole incident got me really cranky, but I managed my best smile during dinner, ate a bit, then left dinner early to attend yoga.

After class, I felt rather guilty that I was so hostile towards our family dinner even if I didn't show it. When I got back home, my 2 aunts were still there watching tv. So I decided to make up for my quick getaway by chatting with them for a while.

We had a few stories to share and I enjoyed spending a few minutes with them. The best thing was, that we got to talk about my mom. I found out a bit more about what my mom went through during her last few months, I got to reminice our last few weeks together, in Paris, Rome, and up to the last days of at the hospital.

I was really glad I got to talk to them. It got me thinking of my mom again. It got me remembering how much she loved us (her family) and how bitin our time together was.

I miss my mom, but I'm glad I got to spend so many years with her. I'm glad she was there to watch me grow up. I'm glad I got to spend time with my mom before she passed away. And I'm glad for people like my aunties who help me remember

I had a really great surfing weekend! Actually, any surfing weekend that I come home alive is a good weekend. But, I'll write about that tomorrow. Today is the birthday of a very good friend of mine.

Happy Birthday Erwin!!!

Erwin has been a very good friend since I've known him. He has played a major part in my pre-graduate academic path re-evaluation (Translation: He helped me pick a new Ateneo College after the infamous Exodus) I was planning to go to Davao, but I ran into him and Vito and they convinced me to go to Naga instead. And, surprisingly, much of my life began in Naga.

Erwin's a bit of a war freak. But he's very kind and supportive to us, his friends and family. He believes he invented the word "JOLOG". Whether of not that is true, He certainly is imbued with the true spirit of JOLOG-ness. (Hehehe, that's a complement).

He's a very hard worker, going for 48 or more hour workdays. He loves his DVD's (He can open up a stall in greenhills with his collection) He also has a vary interesting mixed lineage (Muslim, Arabic, Hindu, Jamaican and Filipino)


So Erwin, Happy Birthday again. And I'm really grateful for the friendship we've shared for the past 4 or so years, I hope to see you in Xaymaca soon, with a table full of food and drinks, preferably this week. (Hint hint hehehehe).

Ingat DUDE.

TAROT CARDS

I remember when I used to "read" people using tarot cards. From the feedback I got, I believe I was quite good at it. A lot of people were surprised at how accurate my readings were. In retrospect, I am not surprised that they were.

You see, reading tarot cards is like looking at a painting. We put together a story, an emotion, a thought or and idea based on the images and colors that we see on the canvass. The same goes with tarot reading. A story or thought is interpreted from the cards spread out on the table. There are general associations with each card (the card DEATH usually means change, moving from one phase to another, the card THE EMPEROR usually means rigidity, tradition and authority) and each position (the cards are spread in a pattern, each position in the pattern having a significance, like FAMILY, HEALTH, THE FUTURE, THE PAST). So I get the meanings of each card, their position and significance, their general feel, and put it all together intuitively.

Just like viewing a painting, there is no hard rules as to how to read the tarot. It uses a lot of intuition. So, why are the readings accurate?

We are all connected.

Deep down inside we all have similar experiences. We have all loved someone who can never love us back the same way. We have all lost something. We have all experienced happiness. We all WANT happiness. All of us have felt inferior. All of us have felt alone.

When I read the cards, I reflect a lot of what I have seen, felt and experienced to the person I'm reading for. What they see as my accurate reading into their lives is (more accurately) and accurate reading into MY life and all our lives. Our diverse, separate, unique yet undeniably connected lives.

CONNECTED

I remember feeling so alone and isolated sometimes back in high school. I felt like the world was spinning with everyone else and leaving me behind. And I know almost everyone has felt this way at one time.

I remember something I heard in college, where there was forest somewhere. People generally thought it was a forest, seeing hundreds and thousands of trees growing from the ground. But later on they found out that it was just ONE SINGLE PLANT, that they were all connected under the soil. An entire forest, a single being.

I think people are like that. On the surface, we al have our individual lives, different, separated, and seemingly alone, but at the roots we are all connected to one (And I'm not talking about being connected to a MATRIX supplying energy to robot armies). We are one.

AEON FLUX

One of my favorite cartoons is AEON FLUX. They have great philosophical thought in a lot of the episodes. There was this episode when they found out that at one time, humans KNEW that they were all connected. They felt their connection to other people, to ALL people. But then a virus attacked that part of the brain that made us aware of this connection. This virus has since then been passed on, and inherited genetically. So now, here we are, feeling alone in this world. Unaware of the inherent connection we have will all humans. Thus, we have division, hatred, fear, insecurity, paranoia and violence.

I find this to be very true. A lot of the horrible things people do to each other comes from not realizing that we are all connected. When we feel bad we lash out at other people hoping to make ourselves feel better. When we're insecure, we put down others to elevate ourselves. We rarely realize that it only makes it worse when we do so.

Oh, and I found this just now.

Nicknamed "Pando" (meaning, "I spread") by the scientists who studied it, the world's largest living organism is a 6,600-ton aspen grove and is one gargantuan plant. The entire 200-acre area it covers is filled with what appears to be an entire forest of trees, but all of the trees are "suckers" that have grown from the root system of a single tree. Scientists determined that these trees are all part of a single organism by conducting genetic tests on tissue samples from all of the trees.

http://www.extremescience.com/aspengrove.htm

Ok, there. This blog finally got a much needed face lift. It's much more readable now and easier on the eyes don't you think? Ahhh. Zen. Yes.

It was fun putting up the new look. Had to experiment with HTML, which I'm only very lightly familiar with, but I'm slowly getting the hang of it. Hope to put in more innovations as I go along.

From: "Adrian"
Subject: RE:
Date: Wed, 19 Nov 2003 18:32:36 +0800
To: "'Ernest de Castro'"

Checked your blogger... did not have my name mentioned once... NOT
FUCKING ONCE! If my name isn't mentioned, why would you expect me to
read all your stupid thoughts!!!! Stupid cock-ass!!!! Hehehehe biro lang
dude

Adrian


Therefore....ADRIAN, ADRIAN, ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,ADRIAN, ADRIAN,


and before I forget ADRIAN

hehehe.

Oh, and hi to everyone:

Jet, Karl, Honelynet (Shobe), Georgie, Mike C. , Sheena, Maryanne, Laurence, Kenneth S. Viva, Barok, Kai, Ken (Jao), Eric, Aimee, Patricia, Mike S., Jaja, Nino, Dodo, Jake, Kai, Paul M, Gina, Aol, Genie, Anne, Eena, Joel, Ron, Ella, Maillol, Cocoy, Nino G., Pegs, Erwin, Angelo, Denden, Chris, Ric, Atom, Vito, Francis, Ricky B., my pet sisters Jean and Nicole, my adopted brother Andrew, my sarcastic Father, my ever loyal Voodoo, and the late Pajero who I truly miss hehehe.

I didn't want to post this, because it sounded tooo cheezy and preachy. But I typed it already and it would be interesting to see how I feel about this particular piece a few months down the road. So my appologies to those who might read this

WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU GET

A lot of people take pride in saying that phrase when referring to themselves. Ofcourse what they mean is that they are act, dress and behave naturally without any pretentions, masks, or "projections". While the intention is good, the phrase is not the least bit true.

"...our material world is just the thinnest veneer on the surface of existance..."
from the article Gazing Peacefully by Richard Rosen, Yoga international July 2003

While it is true that you can sometimes tell a lot about a person just by looking, what you see can barely describe WHO the person really is. The physical shell tells nothing of how the person has loved, laughed, cried, learned. A persons behavior or mannerism tell very little of their hopes, dreams, accomplisments, and deeds. Can you tell from "What you see" a person's beliefs or reason for being?

I try to think about this whenever I see the people who's mere presence irks me. Whether is the annoying client, or the loud chattering girls in the restaurant, or any other person I have pre-judged in my mind as annoying, or stupid or selfish . We are all beings of the light. We all deserve the kindness and compassion we all want ourselves

LABLES

I was really entertained when I got a new toy last week. It's just a LABLER, but it was kinda fun to use. Its one of those small electronic gadgets that has a small keyboard and LCD up front and it prints LABELS, like name tags for books or tags for folders and such. It gave me a sense of peace when I looked at the office shelf and saw the folders, books, binders labeled properly.

I guess its human nature to WANT to label. We labeled ALL the plants and animals on earth for godssake. (The Books Genesis will state that we DID infact name it for GOD's sake ---Theogogians, don't castigate me, just making a pun) But we label averything else. We label people: NERD, JOCK, ATHLETE, CONO, SIRA-ULO, LONER, TECHIE, RELIGIOUS etc

Of course out of a lack of information on a person we call him/her by whatever is his/her most prominent feature, and it makes it easier for people to know who you're talking about.


As such labels are only REFERENCE points. But people tend to stay with the label as the ALL DEFINING characteristic of a person, Ignoring anything else that person may have to offer.

"Your girlfriend is a SLUT"
"He's a LOSER"
"You're a WIERDO"

People can never be contained in labels. People change, grow, and are several things at the same time.
I can honestly say that I am lazy AND hardworking, or that I am a quiet person who sometimes talks too much, that I am focused AND absentminded, I am very cautious AND reckless.

Labels are sometimes necessary. The trick is not to get too caught up in it that we THINK we already know a person. Here's a tip

"Nobody REALLY knows anybody"
-most likely misquoted from the movie RULES OF ATTRACTION

We can make our minds so still like water that beings gather about us to see their own images and so live for a moment with a clearer, perhaps fiercer life because of our silence

William Butler Yeats

I plan to put a new look to this blog. Its so hard to read! hehehe. Or it just might be the 15" crappy monitor i'm viewing it with.

I have begun a journey into self realization through yoga in th past few months. I've mostly been doing the excersises, the physical aspect of yoga called Hatha yoga. But as I progress, I start to look for more mental and psychological and perhaps even spiritual excercises to help me become a better person.

The Hatha yoga has really helped me physically. I have no doubt on that. I'm slimmer and leaner than I have ever been. I've also started a vegatarian practice which really complements my yoga and also keeps me slim and cut (without all the saturated fat found in meat)

I realized later on that I needed more than hatha yoga to change my perspective on life. I was still generally irritable, unhappy, and stressed. I started looking into zen and yoga philosophies of detatchment, calmness of mind, and compassion.

And thats where I am right now. At this journey to be tha calmest, most "unfaze-able" and detatched mothaF**** you've ever met.

I'm kidding about the last paragraph. I coud'nt resist putting that in though. That is what yoga is also about anyway. Being aware of your feelings and present to yourself.

I read this quotation from the Yoga International March 2003 Issue about mindful yoga


"...mindful yoga is a yoga of wholeness that has nothing to do with what your body can or can't do at any given moment, or whith how your posture looks. It has everything to do with how awake you are in your life, and how embodied you are in the only moment in which you are ever alive - which is always now"